Don't bother polling...

Firstly thank you for all you "helpful" people who did cast your vote...i'm sure striking lottery is really an OPTION...that choice was simply put in to see which of you are seriously out there to help me...tsk tsk tsk...turns out there was none...

Anyway, the main reason why there is no need for the poll anymore is that I have taken the decision to quit. Things were actually sorta looking up and so....yes, it's pretty sudden...even for me...

My company (ex-company, rather) hired a HR professional months ago...her task was to speak to each and every employee on what their job role was...only a couple of weeks ago, she finally got to our department...honestly I really dunno what is the point of hiring someone to draw up your job scope...considering, aren't you already hired? if your bosses dunno what the hell you r doing...ain't something seriously wrong?

I didn't know exactly what to tell her...as in, should I hard-sell myself or not...coz I don't even know what the objective is...how to play the game? anyway...it was pretty antagonising...but after 2 super long discussions..she finally came up with my role description...very detailed...right down to the nuts and bolts of what I do on a daily basis....

Now, this role description, to my understanding...was only a "draft"...it will be sent thru to Management (ie: Towkay, Towkay Neo & Jing Li) to get approval..meaning i assumed that they will have another discussion with ME..to see if both Management and I agree that these are my responsibilities etc...I mean, you don't need me to tell you that this is the appropriate way to handle this kind of matter right?

At the same time..my Jing Li wrote me a role description as well...based on how he thought my role should be like...we agreed to have a discussion this week to talk about it...

But...my role description written by the HR professional turned up on seek.com...tho the company name was not mentioned...how i know it was for my job?...well, firstly, the agent was the same one that got me this fucked-up job...and she was so lazy that the ad was word for word as what the HR professional wrote...save for some stupid typos and the fact the ad was to advertise for someone with 3 times my work experience...

how fucking under-hand and unprofessional...seriously why did I waste my time with them at all?!

Maybe they are trying to hire a more experienced person to help me...maybe I'm mistaken, the ad was not put up by my company at all...maybe maybe maybe...i have discussed the possibilities with Mere...the bottom-line is they are still unprofessional and why should I work for this type of people anymore? Besides...i am not quitting just for one stupid ad...the ad was simply the last straw...

For some reason...when I get pretty worked up...my mind tends to express everything in chinese or cantonese...as in...i dunno why..english words can't seem to give me the exact description of how i feel and what i would like to do to people who annoy me...don't worry...no hokkien vulgarities involved...don't see how someone esle's maternal genetials come into play on how i feel....

hence...i am sometimes lost for words on how to express myself in formal writing...i can't exactly use the words "stay in your stupid company any longer my life will be shorter leh" in my resignation letter right?...

So Mere kindly offered to draft it out for me...I didn't use his in the end..coz in summary, his was really pretty harsh...and, it's basically not me...so we compromised...and this what i submitted this morning:

honestly waaaayyyyyy milder than what Mere would prefer...like what Dana told me..."don't burn you bridges"...but hey, no bridges there..and also..this mild version probably got my towkay steaming from his ears already...(which btw, I'm told...he hasn't spoken a word since I left...ha!)

Before I submitted my resignation this morning...I cleared up my desk and threw away all drafts, files and paperwork that I was working on...it's MY work...they didn't like it...so everything into the bin...I also deleted all my digital files...of course, I know IT can possibly salvage them from the depths of the server...but i renamed them all to either "draft", "draft1" or "text" or something really "useful"...if they want to spend time opening all the files before salvaging...be my guest :)

In a word of fairness to my jing li and towkay...i honestly don't think they knew about the ad at all...i confronted my towkay this morning when i gave him my letter...he was really lost for words...asked me to wait for the Towkay Neo to come back...no fucking way! I'm outta there...why should I wait...wait to be told that yes, they are replacing me becoz they thought i was crap?

I know deep down my towkay knows that the towkay neo did it...not the first time btw...i was the one who did the previous round of ads...we advertised even before the person was told to leave...and yes, that person found the ad..and sent a stinker of an email to everyone in the office..."watch out, you could be next" was the warning...ha!...just didn't expect that it would be me...

i left not sobbing but with my pride intact...as far as i'm concerned...i know i am not at fault and if the other staff members hear of this...Managment will be blamed and seen as despicable...i probably did hit the nail on the head with my letter as well...if not, my towkay whom is a really nice, gentle, kind person...won't be still red in the face and steaming at his ears...

My Jing Li did call earlier to let me know he thinks that i was very unfairly treated and that the towkay and himself are trying to find out exactly what happened...i said my peice...i don't feel the least bit upset...

How I am feeling now?...just a little bit du lan..and wish that I will find out if the Towkay Neo will get told off by the Towkay...hmmm...i will check into that...but as of 3pm this afternoon....i know the Towkay Neo still hasn't stepped into the office...so we shall see...

My plans for the next few days is to chill out a little...and continue with the job hunt of course...

who knows...i might come back to singapore for a while...just had a look at my bank account..had more money than i remembered...luckily...